What is there to do ??

Hello all .

Sorry I have been busy busy .So lets see last Friday I went with my sister and some of her ex co workers so celebrate her new job .I had a great freaken time.I laughed and laughed it brings me so much joy that my sister is doing well and that she is happy.Joseph had a job interview at Whataburger and got the job I am so proud of him .He will start working Monday .Everyone in our family is proud of him .Next year hopefully Jesse will get a summer job.

Man how time flies .I can not believe that I have a child that is old enough to work .How did this happen ? When I look at all the kids I am amazed that they are all mine .Joseph ,Jesse and Cynthia are all taller then me .Sara and James are almost there.I can still remember them all being babies .Oh how I use to bath them and hold them .Oh the way they smelled after the bath all fresh with that baby powder smell and baby magic lotion.with Joseph I was afraid to do everything from a simple bath to changing a pamper .I didn't want to hurt him .He was a preemie small and perfect and best of all he was mine all mine.Those perfect little fingers and toes .His beautiful black hair his dark skin he brought me so much joy.By the time Jesse came around I was terrified now I had two babies ,I just never had felt so much love for anything like I did them not even for myself.I could just look at them all day .We had only a small bedroom to share that had a twin size bed and two cribs .And it all worked out for itself.I met the man that I would marry when Jesse was only two months old and have been with him ever since.We eventually added to our family three more kiddos .By the time Cynthia came along I was a pro with babies .I don't know what the future will hold for us but I will be on my guard for all the good and the bad.

What I have learned from being a a mommy is that you will tolerate what you taught you never would,that you forgive all the bad,that your love for your children is totally unconditional ,that all your children want is you and there daddy to be happy and love them everyday .

Just sit back and enjoy the ride they call life.

Congradulation's Sanny !!!!!

Congratulation's Sanny !!!!!!!!!!!!
You deserve this you have worked hard .Let's see you have done a lot of things this last couple of years .Like what you ask ?You have changed your life and all for the better . I know a lot of things were hard for you to do and you did it and now you are a better stronger women for it .And thru everything that has been done you still remain and good person that is happy with her decision.Now you are starting a new journey and you will do just fine .Hopefully the state people are ready for Beyonce .If things get rough just be that girl that I pushed to fight at the University Apartments LOL oh, wait not that girl she was scared be that girl that you are now the "I won't take no shit from anyone girl". I love you !!

Bianca

Lets see where do I start.When I had the idea to start writing this blog .I was a little set back with what do I keep private what do I let everyone know .But i think that everyone needs to know when you are doing great and when you not doing good at all and when your at your bottom.
I mean lets be honest we all have our ups and downs .When we are doing well we want everyone to know but when we at our worse we keep to ourselves at least that's what I do.
So with great thought I will tell you what I saw today and how I felt and all the emotions and thoughts that went trough my head .
On my way to work this morning my usual route the usual traffic the usual homeless people at the corner ,but wait there was a little girl begging a freak en kid a petite homeless kid .I was dumb founded .And of course she came up to the driver side asking for money ,my heart dropped I was trying so hard not to cry and everyone thats knows me I am tough cookie it takes alot to break me.So I told her I was sorry I had no money but I talked to her for little bit .She looked tired and dirty I wanted to wipe her face and take her hair out of her face .She was thin and looked so defenseless.Then all of a sudden I remembered I had a bottle water and gave it to her when i handed it to her I asked her for her name and she looked confused she said "what?" I said what is your name and she told me her name I felt so bad when was the last time someone cared enough to ask this kid her name .She told me her name and I told her I'd pray for her.
So finally the light turned green and I drove off .I was so mad and sad I started crying .Where the hell are her parents ?But then I thought is this what people though of me when Joseph ran a way ?What is she running from abuse ,neglect just not wanting to follow the rules her parents had.When Joseph ran a way he was running from what I could not give him his dad.When he would come back home he would be so thin so dirty ,and we would all tell him how much we loved him and he didn't care he would just take off.Everyone told me he'll get tired of being on the street but he didn't .Then other people would say the police would catch up with him . I knew that they were right .But I also knew that if he were caught by the police he would either turn himself around or just go down hill.You see we tired counseling one on one group counseling with other teenagers all of his family tried to help we all tried we all begged we cried we screamed but nothing worked.Unfortunately Joseph got in trouble with the police and was placed in a residential treatment facility for 18 mths.So after being a run a way for a year and then 18 mth's of being in the facility .He finally gave up and my kid changed .I have my son back .I have all my kids together finally after about three years.So when I saw this little girl .All the feelings that I had once felt came back to me and I just wanted to tell her it will all be okay just go home ,but then I taught is home a safe place for her .Someone has to miss her .How many other homeless run a ways are out there ?How do we fix this problem? What do you tell a kid that is so lost ,I know what I told my own son . All I know is you don't give up you pray and you stand by your kid at there lowest and you make sure they know how much they are loved and wanted and you listen to them you really listen you put all your feelings aside and you let that kid tell you everything thing they have bottled up and when they do that they are setting themselves free .All that weight is lifted off their shoulders.


Hopefully this little girl will one day go home or to safe place with a family that loves her and be a great young women. Just hope and pray she will not be forgotten......

Girl's and scissors

I am sure by the title most of you know what happened.I got home last night so tired .My hubby had made a really good dinner spaghetti and salad .He waited until I got home to eat ,so we are sitting down minding or own business .When Chippy and Spanky come down stairs saying they need to speak to me "ALONE".I was like hell what now.So I was like okay when I am done eating they just stood there staring at me.So I got up from the table and went to the bathroom with the girls.Cynthia couldn't stop with her teenage girly yell .Then she did it she took her hair

out of the bun and there it was .She had chopped off her hair.Why?Why?Why?So I had to go back to the kitchen and ask Ralph for some money .Then I told him I had to take Chippy to the store .The store just happened to be the hair salon.Ralph would have went crazy if he seen Chippy's hair ,so I figured I would take her to fix it then I'd deal with him when I got home.

They ladies were great .They were like we've seen worse .So they fixed Chippy's do.I was so upset but I got over it .It will grow back.I told her I hope you have learned your lesson ,DON'T CUT YOUR OWN HAIR !!!

She just giggled so you know what that means she didn't learn her lesson.

Quick check in.

So lets see there not much to write .Well I picked up Jesse yesterday from my nieces .Joseph is home to .So all my kiddos are home.Last night I was feeling yucky.So I turned in early.The kids were nice in quite for me.
I woke up this morning feeling a little better.Beb has the day off so he made Chippy and I an awesome breakfast pork chops and eggs with toast.I guess him and the kids are going to lounge all day at home.
We have been fairly busy at work ,um rephrase that ,this morning we were busy.FYI do not ever ever order the fried macaroni from Plucker's one of the guys at work ordered it and the stuff looked so nasty I tried to warn him not to order it but, no he wanted to be hard headed .Watch in about and hour he's going to run to the bathroom .Yup and you know he isn't going to be feeling to hot then.
Any who that's all I got for right now .....

Mustache of all mustache's were have you gone?

So last night for my husband Ralph made the best BBQ ever .Yes , I know it was father's day and I should of let him have break but, he enjoys being the great pit master he is.He out did himself this time.So usually when Ralph (AKA Beb ) is done bar- b-que-ing he'll go upstairs and take a bath.So he did his thing and when he came downstairs abracadabra his mustache was gone and let me tell you we were all stunned .James about jump out of his skin ,Sara was scared shit less and Cynthia and me were wordless.

I know your asking what's the big deal it's just a mustache.Nope that's were your wrong .My Beb had this thick, black and full mustache .Sure I hated it when he trimmed the hairs and when it was time to give me a kiss it would hurt because it felt like little needle's poking my face .When I woke up this morning I sat in bed and looked at him .He looks alot younger .It made me smile .I have no idea why it just did.I guess it's because I always tell Ralph he is un- spontaneous .Like he's stuck in his ways .You know same haircut since I have been with him which has been 16 years ,same mustache same ,like in clothing same everything.

So I asked him why he shaved it off.Do you know what he told me that James double dared him.LOL.I couldn't stop laughing .

It amazing after 16 years of being together he can still make me laugh and almost tee tee in my pants.

Love ya

Beb

Father's Day

What makes a great dad.In my life it has taken more then a dad to raise me it took my uncles ,my aunt ,my grandparents and my mom you could can say all these people played the dad role in my life.They took care of me and my sister with out once making us feel like an outsider.We have a huge beautiful Latin family .I will not speak badly of my father for him being absent in our life's.But instead I will forgive all that has happened and enjoy what time I do have with him.

My dad is a strong man a very proud man .I believe in his time of growing up life was very hard on him .Dads, well at least my grandfather didn't show to much affection towards him.But when I look at my grandfather and how loving he is with my children and with me it is hard to believe .I think maybe he knows he wasn't to touchy feely with his own children But when he talks of his own father which would be my great great grandfather it is no wonder my grandfather is the way he is.All my uncles on dad's side as well as my mothers are very good men.And my dad now is a wonderful grandpa to my children as well to my brothers kids .He loves them all so much I can see it when he smiles at them the way he holds and hugs them ,even when they are speaking to him he gives them all the attention they deserve.

I feel that the next generation of men in my family will have learned the don't and do's from the men they have in their family now.Dads are so important .The boys Joseph and Jesse their father died in 2005 and not until he passed away did I realize how much my sons longed for him.It was a very pain full and hard time for them.As many of my close family and friends know .But I have tried my best to answer all questions they may have about him .But I was so young when I had my boys Joseph will be 17 years old in August and Jesse will be 16 in November,it seems I have forgotten alot of things and that upsets me because they want to know about him.But luckily I have their dads family which they keep the memories alive and not forgotten for my sons.

I never really had seen a dad .I mean a man that takes care and love's his family until I met Ralph's dad .I was this is how it is suppose to be loving ,peaceful and caring.So intern Ralph is a good daddy to all of our children.I know this pass year with all the events that have happened with Joseph .It has tested him .But in the end he tries to have a close relationship with him they talk more they laugh more together .Time will heal I firmly believe that , I have to .I look at my daughters with Ralph and I am like damn that's what me and my sister should of had with or own father.But I am a lucky women to have such a good man one that cares for his children and treats them all with respect and most important the love that they all deserve .They might not all be his flesh in blood but he does love them each and everyone of them.

I am so blessed..

Why oh ,why is it so hot ?

So this morning Ralph got up early took my truck into get an oil change.Came home around 11 a.m ,I had just jumped out of the shower .And he was like what do you want to do.Honestly I just wanted to stay home and rest but I knew the kids wanted to get out of the house.So everyone got dressed and we left to go into Austin.We stopped at my two favorite garden spots Diaz Gallery and The Great Outdoors.I couldn't help but take some pictures of the kids.

The were having a good time but I think the sun started to get to them .And after looking at what the temp. was outside I couldn't blame them .

Ralph and I were getting tired to so we headed home.

Joseph went to Schlitterbaugn and I called Jesse this morning he was fine.Tomorrow will be fathers day . I have no idea what we will be doing.

well I think I am going to out side with Ralph he really does love to be in the back yard .He just adores all the work he has put into it .

Cynthia in all her glory!!

Chippy in all her glory !! So Miss.Cynthia (AKA Chippy) has to go to summer school.Yes,sir.Just having good looks does not pass you to the 8th grade .But the good news is she'll be in the 8th grade once she completes summer school.

And let me tell you she is not happy.The nerve of the them making Chippy get up early do her hair and makeup and lets not forget pick out her alfit that can take an eternity to get right .You know the right bracelet ,earings,belt and shoes.And I have the prevlige of hearing Chippy's woes about the teachers , students , how there are no bathroom doors that locke and why was she cursed with my curly hair that wil take her forver to straighten .

Yup I get to hear all this while getting myself ready for work and on the lovely ride to drop her off at school.She makes me laugh .But i have to laugh in the inside because god forbid I laugh at loud and she give me that look because she is soooo serious about her issues.

One thing that I am so grateful for are that little girls today look so much different from the girls or the girl I was.You know the mall high hair .The hairstyles that took one can of Aqua net to get just right.It was all about how high could I get my hair.Damn and I thought I looked so cute.Now the wear it straight as a board .And it's soft their hair is actually soft !!Shot you couldn't even run your hand thru my hair .Let's not forget the black eyeliner .I would even go outside if I didn't have any on.Now their all natural .I could go on for days of all the difference's there are.But I won't .

So I told the kids last night that I started writing a blog .They were all happy .James (AKA baby boo) was so happy .And Sara(AKA Spanky) couldn't belive it .Cynthia just laughed .Jesse is at my nieces house so he doesn't know yet and Joseph has been spending time with his Aunt.I miss them both .I keep asking them when are they coming home .There like never it's summer .I am so happy all is well with the kids.

I did it.

Yuppers, I started my blog today.After much thought and asking my sister if this sounded like a good idea she agreed .She said do whatever makes me happy.I love reading other people's blog and so it seems that I have the blog bug.

Now what should I write about the options are endless?My kids I can talk about all day but I really don't want to bore anyone .Don't get me wrong they are great kids but not everyone wants to hear about what babyboo did today at school.Or do they hmm? I guess the first thing that everyone will have to know are the kids names so here we go Joseph is 16 ,Jesse 15, Cynthia13,Sara 12,James 9 .Yes I know five .And of course they are a part of my everyday life.My reason for getting my botty up in the morning and driving an hour to work and coming home oh ,the joy to coming home and hearing all the teenager girl drama.Lovely but i wouldn't trade it for the world.Don't get me wrong there are those moments were I walk into my bathroom and lock the door behind me and think hmm can I drown myself in the toilet water .Just a joke .I sit and look at myself in the mirror and I start to literally think about what the problem is and try to find a freak en way to fix it.And I hope to God it's fixable .

Luckily I am married and usually if the problem is to big I can run to my husband .But usually once I get a hold of him I can not bear to tell him what is all going on .I think .Why should I stress him out ?I can handle everything .This is not a good idea .But that's what happens.I generally keep the really shitty stuff to myself .So you all will get to hear me rant and rave so be ready...